November42011
Things I’ve learnt at University so far
- I get argumentative in seminars
- I don’t like living with stereotype students
- People don’t know how to clean up after themselves
- Noodles can sustain human life
- Food is expensive
- Having your own personal fridge/kettle is essential to avoid shitmunchers
- Bread goes mouldy quickly
- The walls in student halls are as soundproof as tissue (I can hear people having a wee at the end of the corridor)
- Maintenance men are useless
- I am ridiculously reliant on the internet/torrents
- Halls internet is shit. Shit shit shit.
- Speakers are required only to drown out other speakers which play less than decent music - why don’t people buy headphones?
- I am a badman at bullshitting work
- To comfortably have a poo you must wait until 60% of flatmates have gone to bed. This way you avoid the awkward PLOP while still only having a small chance that someone will need to use the toilet whilst you’re in there.
- Forgetting to eat so much that your stomach shrinks is an effective way of getting fuller quicker by accident.
- Quadruple strength cordial needs to be invented
- Ginger girls have the worst taste in music
- There is in fact a strange cosmic force which makes Welsh people get along with me far more easily than other people - Shaun the sheep.
- I still hate dubstep